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Showing posts with label Dexter Grif. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dexter Grif. Show all posts

Huh...

6
User Twinkies-n-Beer-06 Wrote:

Hey, guys. It's been a while. I didn't really post because I got the feeling that no one was ever on and that no one would read it, and why should I bother to type something no one will read? Aw, who am I kidding? Most of you losers probably won't read it anyway.

So, the blog is blue now, huh? That's dumb, but whatever. I'm surprised there hasn't been a bigger fuss. Then again, when the blog was made red, it was meant to piss off the already outburst-prone Blues, and this time the only person who'd be generally mad is Sarge, but he doesn't really care anymore.

So, I beat Fable 2. Several times, actually. The first time through, I was playing like my life depended on it, but now I just kinda play casually. It's actually a pretty easy game, but it's fun to play over and over, so that makes up for it. I just play it to see how the different choices effect the game. It's weird how much difference it makes. Like, there's this part where your character's a kid, and this guard asks you to find some wanted posters around town. You get the choice to give the posters to the guard or to this really shady other guy who apparently your character's sister seems to know and hate. You still get paid one gold either way, so the only difference is that giving them to the shady guy saves you a bit of a walk. If you give the posters to the guard, the area that you're in turns out pretty nice when you come back as an adult, but if you give the posters to the shady guy, it becomes a breeding ground for crime with no guards or cops, and the shady guy is the ringleader of some sort of mob. There's a bunch of things like that. Oh, I also tried playing as a girl, just to test the water there, see if it makes any difference. It doesn't, really, except for one side quest where a ghost of someone who killed themself wants you to avenge them and seduce the former lover who broke their heart and then dump the poor sap (you can choose to either dump them or marry them. Just a tip--- revenge solves absolutely nothing). Anyway, when you play a dude, the ghost is also a dude and their lover is a girl, but when you play a girl, the ghost is a girl and the lover is a dude. Either way, the lover's name is Alex. The funny thing is, you find girl Alex out on the bridge, watching the river. You find guy Alex in the tavern, getting wasted. What's that supposed to mean?

Anyway, I haven't been doing anything else of any particular interest. At least, nothing I'd be willing to talk about on a public blog. I haven't been to the movie theater lately--- trying to avoid the New Moon crowd. The only opinion on Twilight I have is pure disinterest. I could really care less. I'm not gonna read it or watch the movies, but if anyone else here does, more power to ya. I just don't want to get mixed in with that crowd. The theater is a madhouse! I have no idea why anyone finds any particular movie that exciting. I mean, I LOVE the Batman comics, and I have since I was a kid, but I wasn't in with those lunatics who packed into the theater like a bunch of sardines to watch The Dark Knight at midnight. I mean, sheesh, I was excited, too, but I had the self control to wait until the week after it came out to go see it. Calm down, people. The only movies that had an excuse to be that popular were the Star Wars ones.

Dude, Simmons, when the mental ward clears out, we should go see Planet 51, that looks funny. Or maybe Law Abiding Citizen. Also, I want a rematch on that sexy meter thing.

Coming back.

1
User Twinkies-N-Beer-06 wrote:


So, when we went to New Jersey and did what we went there to do. I guess you could say Simmons' family problems are more or less over. His mom is really nice, but his dad... Well, it was all I could do not to STRANGLE that man. What a friggin' jerk. And the people in Simmons' hometown? God. There were only like four people in the whole town who were cool. Now I see why Simmons joined the army--- to get away from all that crap. Jeez.


After that we went back to Hawaii for my Dad's funeral. It was a really nice ceremony. Turns out a college friend of mine went on to become a preacher, so he was the one who spoke at the funeral. Go figure.


And then we had my birthday party today. That was awesome. All my old friends came, and my one friend's jerk boyfriend got to do all the work of setting up while I watched. Simmons got me Fable 2, so now we have something new to play at base besides all those other games I've beaten a hundred times. Also, a bunch of my friends got me a guitar! Here's a picture.

Yup. Pretty freakin' awesome. My friends are great. Anyway, my birthday was going great until Sarge called. Whoo. So, I just got off the airline website and our flight back is booked for tomorrow morning. Fantastic. Great way to ruin a guy's birthday, Sarge. We'll be back in the Gulch sometime tomorrow.


....

2
User Twinkies-N-Beer-06 wrote:

......He's gone....

Pops passed away about 11:30 this morning....

And now Simmons is having some family problems, too, so we're on our way to Newton, New Jersey. We're currently on layover at one of our stopping points. We're in Minneapolis. We're going to Detroit next, and then we'll go to Jersey. I don't actually know what town the airport is in. Newark, I think... I could ask Simmons, but he's perusing the newsstand for candy and magazines, so I'll ask him later. It's a ways away from Newton, so...

Oh, yeah. Saw my ex-girlfriend at the airport. She told me I ruined her life. That was a truly sparkling addition to my already fantastic day. She's going back to Canada, apparently. Hopefully her folks back in Montreal can help her get her life back in order. I feel really bad... The details of the situation are too personal to talk about on the blog, but she wasn't kidding when she said I screwed up her life.

Yep. Fan-freaking-tastic.

Trouble Back Home

10
User Twinkies-N-Beer-06 wrote:

Well, I just found out I gotta go back to Honolulu for a couple of days. My mom called about twenty minutes ago. My dad's alcoholism has led to severe liver failure, and he isn't looking good. So I get to sit in a cramped hospital room with a bunch of relatives I either don't know or don't like, while my dad slowly dies of his horrible disease.

I'm sorry, Sister. I'm sorry that this is how you had to find out. I wanted to call you, but I didn't really know if I could face you with the news just yet. I'll pay for your tickets. Also, I... kinda needed a friend... so I'm asking Simmons to come along. You can bring a friend, too, if you feel like it would help. You can pick anyone you want. Their ticket's on me, too. I know Pops and I never got along for real... but he's still my dad. I just need some moral support.

Tucker, just a warning. Now would not be an appropriate time for you to crack a joke about me and Simmons. I'm not trying to offend you or anything, I just know that you tend to... Well, you know. I honestly don't think you're that insensitive, but I'm not taking any chances,

I dunno when I'll get back, but we're taking a flight tomorrow afternoon. Sorry about the short notice, but I don't know if he'll make it much longer. I'm bringing my laptop with me, so Simmons, Sister, and I can still update. Feel free to comment as needed. You'll still get a reply in a timely manner.

*sigh* I don't have much else to say...

I guess... I should go pack... or something....

Random Stream of Conciousness

18
User Twinkies-n-Beer-06 wrote:


I got a lotta stuff going on, so I'm basically just gonna write about whatever comes to mind.


So, yes, as Simmons has stated, we went to the movies as promised. I dunno why everyone's so damn surprised. I am capable of doing nice things for people once in a while. If something is my bad, I'll fix it. I'm not a total ass. Maybe you guys should remember that for a change.


And yes, admittedly, Simmons did get a better rating from that Love Meter machine, but I'm satisfied with my rating and know that my charming personality will win out over Simmons' good looks in the end. Everyone knows that the girls worth dating are looking for a guy with a good personality, and if you can fake that, you're set.


Speaking of Simmons, why does EVERYONE think we're having sex?! Seriously, guys. Simmons and I JUST NOW started sort of getting along. Think about it. If we were gay, I'd totally have been a lot nicer to Simmons, because I would've been trying to get in his pants. But I'm not, which is why we're always fighting. If that doesn't make sense to you, PLEASE, let me know. I'd be happy to go into detail about all the ways I can prove we're not "involved".


On another note, I've really gotten into Final Fantasy lately. I'm loving the tenth one and the eighth one, and I don't get what the hype is about the seventh one. I mean, yeah, it's good and all, but is it worth all the merchandising? No. Is the movie remake necessary? Not really. Is it ZOMGTHISGAMEISSOFUCKINAMAZING? Absolutely not. Also, does anyone know where I can get FF6? It's really old and all, but I heard the villain is freaking awesome and totally creepy. I saw him in a YouTube video of the new arcade fighter thing, which is only in Japanese right now. He looks something like this:

I picked that one because of the phrase on it. Made me laugh. It also kinda reminded me of Tucker's stupid demotivator things.

I mixed a CD today. Anyone want a copy? It's got a lot of Offspring and Weezer on it, and a song by blink-182. There's also a few things by No Doubt. Gwen Stefani is awesome. They're having a reunion tour, by the way. I'm gonna try to get tickets. If anyone wants to go along, they'd better let me know before I buy the tickets.

Could really use a cigarette.


To the Movies

7
User Twinkies-N-Beer-06 wrote:

So, the other night, I went to the movies. Donut and Caboose tagged along because they were on another one of their little play-dates or whatever, so I told them they could get a ride with me if they were quiet in the theater and didn't spend all my money on snacks... because that's my job. They were pretty well-behaved, actually. I was actually surprised that Caboose didn't say a whole lot when I asked him to be quiet. Maybe Church beats him if he doesn't take direction.

Anyway, we saw Land of the Lost. I had seen that TV show version when I was a kid, so I saw it for the sake of nostalgia. Plus, Will Ferrell was in it. It was kickass. The jokes are all really random, so you gotta have an open-minded sense of humor and the ability to laugh at the slightly-dirty jokes in order to enjoy it to the fullest. The main character was totally different from the show, but keep in mind this is Will Ferrell we're talking about. Plus, it's the difference between a low-budget kids' show from back in the day and a modern PG-13 movie from a time where all our humor is derived from sex, drugs, alchohol, and violence. The creepy monster things looked about right, though. The Sleestaks, I think they were called.

Caboose and Donut seemed to like it, except Donut looked a little miffed when they cracked jokes at Will Ferrell's character for liking showtunes from "A Chorus Line". Caboose liked the monkey and the dinosaur. The best part for me was probably the walnut joke. And the part where everyone was drunk was funny, too.

By the way, for those of you who have seen it:

"Matt Lauer can suck it!"

Ha ha ha.

Stuff that happened before today.

10
User Twinkies-N-Beer-06 wrote:

Simmons, what the hell? I don't push anything on you. I just say that I'm not doing my job. You do it for me on your own, dude. I never even told you to. I guess you're just cool like that, which is unusual for you. And that music is better loud! It sounds terrible soft.

Anyway, in that post from yesterday, I talked about meeting Poison Ivy at Six Flags when I was there a few years ago, right? Well, despite the fact that I told Tucker I would NOT send him the picture with her, I posted it on here today. Long story. Donut doesn't post, but he reads what we post, and he asked to see it, and he thought it was "cute" and that I should show it off. Whatever. I just did it so he'd stop nagging me. He's worse than Simmons with the nagging when it comes to things that are "cute".

So, uh, here it is.
.
Yeah, that's my sister next to me. She was pretty young then. I think she was 16. Anyway, on the other side of me is Ivy with her hands all over me, because I'm way sexier than Tucker could ever dream of being and a classy chick like her would rather be with me than him. Just saying.

I had also mentioned seeing The Penguin. We took a separate picture with him, which I lost. That's a bummer, because it was a really funny picture. Sister got to wear the top hat, and I got to wear the monocle. Both of the entertainers we met were really cool and friendly. Thumbs up for awesome staff, Six Flags.

By the way, that roller coaster in the background was the Demon, which is the only roller coaster in the world that I've ever hated. It's got all the loops and crazy tricks of a steel roller coaster with all the whiplash of a wooden one. Ancient piece of shit. The Superman Ultimate Flight was way better. The seats were lay-down seats that put you in the position that Superman uses to fly, so it feels like you're really flying. That loop is INSANE. Sister and I got to ride in the front row.

Man. Now I wanna go back.

(Insert Witty Title Here)

1
User Twinkies-N-Beer-06 wrote:

Don't judge my title. I didn't know what the hell to put there.

Church, if you and your pack of pudgy little girls can carry the hot tub, then you're more than welcome to "appropriate" it, because we'll all be too stunned by the miracle of it to stop you. However, I doubt that the hot tub in question will ever exist because Sarge is way too lame to do anything useful.

Hmm. Anyway, I was watching TV yesterday and I saw a commercial for Six Flags. Now I really want to ride roller coasters. I also want to watch Batman. Six Flags always makes me think of DC comics. The main theme is Loony Tunes, but since the park is owned by Warner Brothers, and so are half the cartoon versions of DC Comics, they do a lot of comic book stuff, too. Last time I was there, I got to meet Poison Ivy and the Penguin. I gotta say I LOVE tight supervillain costumes. They picked a really good actress/entertainer/whatever to play Ivy. She was gorgeous. (NO, Tucker, I will not send you ANY of the pictures I got.) Also, the Penguin's top hat was bitchin'.

Has anyone ever heard of a mixed artist album called "Punk Goes Crunk"? That shit is AMAZING. "Umbrella" by All Time Low is my favorite. I absolutely hated the Rihanna version of that song, but All Time Low made the song incredible. "Still Fly" by The Devil Wears Prada is funny, too. They've got a new one called "Punk Goes Pop", and August Burns Red (screamo death metal band) covers Brittney Spears' "Hit Me Baby One More Time". I nearly passed out from laughing when I heard it. It's so awesome. You guys really need to listen to that.

Pfft. Lame.

0
User Twinkies-N-Beer-06 wrote:

Fuck you, Wyoming. I know you're ignoring me. I'm gonna break into your house and steal the Sims 3 if I have to, dude.

Hey, nice work, Tucker. Post your battle plans all over the Internet for the world to see. Simmons and Sarge will be joining the blog soon, so I hope you're ready for a serious ass-whupping when they read your post. Church, man, some friendly advice--- don't tell Tucker ANYTHING. Oh, and congrats, Caboose, on getting the sniper rifle.

Sarge is a jerk. He used my newspaper to cover the ground while he was oiling up the Warthog and Lopez. THE GROUND. Outside! Why in the hell do you need to protect barren dustbowl dirt from motor oil?! He did that just to piss me off. He even made a point of using the funnies section, which he knows is my favorite part. Sarge should do something constructive with his mechanical skills. Like build us a freakin' hot tub.

Killing Time

0
User Twinkies-N-Beer-06 wrote:

Whatever, Wyoming. Your FACE will get you nowhere.

Oh, dear God. Tucker and I agree? Apocalypse.

By the way, Tucker. Love that "Despair" website. That shit is COLD.

So today I got word from Simmons. He's gonna have a blog post up pretty soon. I wonder if I can get him to post for me so I don't have to get on.... Hmm.... That's a thought. Anyway, he should have something posted by... I dunno, probably like, tomorrow.

Anyway, I didn't do anything even remotely entertaining today. I mean, laying around on the couch eating potato chips is awesome and all, but I can't do just that all day. And if any one of you assholes acts surprised, I'll fuckin' shoot you in the kneecaps. Anyway, no one would really do anything with me, so I was kind of limited to solitary activities. I mean, I could've asked Donut to play video games with me and he totally would, but I just watched a movie with him a few days ago, and I don't want to do too much stuff with him in a single week. I don't want him to think we're friends or anything. That leaves: Simmons, who is, well... Simmons; Sarge, who wants to kill me and makes an effort to do so like every day; the Blues, who are retards; Tex, who's dangerous (not to mention out of town. Wait, would you say "town" for this place? Out of canyon); Sheila, who is also dangerous, has no hands, and is technically a Blue; and Doc. No need for explanation on that one. So I could either watch TV, play a bunch of games I already beat the story mode on, play solitaire, or read. And since everyone knows I can't read without falling aslee-----

Wait. Wyoming has The Sims 3?!?! YOU HAVE TO TELL ME HOW IT IS!!! I want that game so goddamned bad I'd actually do work to get my hands on it! I've been waiting for that to come out forever, but I don't have the money to buy it or the means of transportation to get to a fuckin' game store! Wyoming, be a pal, man. Let me come over and try it?

Whatever. Stuff.

0
User Twinkies-N-Beer06 wrote:

Oh, for God's sake. Church is here. What's next? And since me posting on this stupid blog was Sarge's idea, shouldn't he have to post, too? Just a thought, Sarge.

Caboose, these aren't chat boards. You have to post a full blog entry, not just a comment. If you wanna talk to Church like a conversation instead of a journal, you have to go to the forums. http://rvb-society.co.nr/ Click that. It'll take you there.

Also, I read Wyoming's blog, and I would just like to say that Wyoming is a bitch. A big, fat, whiney, ugly bitch.

Anyway, I didn't do anything today, either. Just sat around, cruisin' the internet on my new laptop, which is actually cool. I also looked up that site everyone talks about, that Twitter thing? It's really stupid. I don't know why everyone is so obsessed with it. All you do is tell other people what you're doing. If I used it, I'd never post. Because I'm never doing anything. I'll admit, I'm totally against work and most action of any kind. Damn proud of it, too. Wanna keep my record.

Let's see, I also discovered http://www.addictinggames.com and http://www.funnyjunk.com, the two best websites on the entire internet. And the internet is frickin' big, so that's something. AddictingGames is exactly what it says--- a website full of addicting games. I like Pandemic 2 because it requires very little movement and you get to use biological warfare to wipe out the human race. I also like that Redneck Olympics thing. It's got monster trucks. Funny Junk is just a place for distasteful yet funny pictures, doctored images, CGIs, and videos. Great stuff. I could stay on that site all day and still not have looked at everything.

Anyway, so, today was fun. For once.

This Canyon Sucks

0
User Twinkies-N-Beer-06 Wrote:

Holy shit, we have a blog now? And just when I thought this canyon couldn't get any lamer. I even had to get my own laptop so Simmons would stop freaking out every time I touched his computer. Never figured out how to use that fancy-ass thing anyway. Mine's nice and simple. And cheap.
Anyway, I suppose I should talk about what I did today, or whatever it is you do on blogs. I can't guarantee anything exciting. I live in Blood Gulch, for Chrissakes.
So pretty much I didn't do shit yesterday. Which rocks. I woke up around noon, decided to stay inside 'cause it was freakin' boiling out today. Sarge gave us a list of chores, which I let Simmons do while Donut and I watched a movie. Anyone ever seen 1408? Some Stephen King book gone movie. It's got John Cusack and Samuel L. Jackson in it (who I still can't look at without thinking that he's tired of these mutherfuckin snakes on this mutherfuckin plane). It's freaky shit, man. Really intense. The thing at the end with his daughter was sad, too. Made Donut cry. Then I sat around looking at a tattoo magazine and listening to Simmons bitch about how I hadn't done anything all day until I fell asleep. I slept on the couch for a while, and Sarge woke me up and told me I had to post on this blog. I looked at it, but I didn't post till this morning.
Whatever. I guess blogging's cool enough, for a chore. Yeah. Sarge added it on as a chore. Freakin' ridiculous, ain't it? But that's Sarge for ya.